New Hauls, New Healing

I started treating myself more often because I realised that it’s the easiest way for me to begin to develop a relationship with myself. I think that throughout my life I have held myself on a pedestal that I didn’t realise was me being way too mean towards myself. I never gave myself an off-day. I never did things that I wanted to do for myself. I never admitted to myself that I was being hard on myself.

And I don’t mean treating myself only by making purchases…. I realise that not many people can do that, but I want to point out that there are more ways to do so than spend money which I frankly don’t have as much of as it may seem. Examples of free things are: I treat myself to dessert for dinner if I want it. I treat myself to a long bath when I feel like my brain’s gears have stopped turning and I can’t force it any longer. I treat myself to ignoring a text I don’t want to answer yet. I let myself be selfish and offended and outspoken more often. This time, I treated myself to some clothes from ASOS and Zara because I feel like lately I’ve needed some more concrete way of displaying the internal changes I’ve made.

Guess what… I just realised that I actually made a change that I said I would at the beginning of this year! : My haul included exactly 0 black-coloured items.

Is this purchase a reflection of my mental state? Do I feel like I can make myself more noticeable now since I won’t be wearing as much black? Are my feelings less straight and deep like the colour black feels? … All deep thoughts aside, the importance of showing you these items lies in the reasons why I chose each item and what they say to me about my current state of mind. So really, this is more a post for myself primarily, and secondarily for the readers. Perhaps you’ll take this with the emotional undertones I feel while writing this. Alternatively, you might take this as just another blog post about clothes that’ll make you think about how to influence your own style decisions.

Regardless of how you see this, here they are!

 

Burgundy boots (Zara)

Out with the old, in with the new… I had a pair of black boots (RIP) from ASOS. They were the perfect heel height, the perfect simplistic style, and came up to the most perfect point at the ankle. Unlike most fashion bloggers, it seems, I don’t have very many options for my daily outfits, so I wore those babies almost everyday and they are now strictly for nights where I expect the bar or club to be nasty and don’t care much about my footwear. I’m trying to keep myself looking clean and beginning to take better care of my belongings.

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The perfect detailing: instead of smooth spandex-like fabric to keep the foot in place, I love this striped pattern that adds class and probably stretches out of shape less over time. Note also the front flap rising above the rest, creating a more upper-class feel (even though these boots only cost $15.00)

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I’ve usually avoided a 90’s-type ridge at the bottom, but from previous experience I can tell you that more traction is definitely a good idea on a boot like this in the environment I’ll be wearing them in (unpredictable weather, horrible ice on the sidewalks in winter, and people walking everywhere waiting for you to fall so they can take a snapchat to send to their friends). The burgundy colour seemed like a return to the 90’s enough, so I figured the ridged sole didn’t seem out of place.

 

Striped tunic (ASOS)

I’m a big fan of tunics. They can upgrade your outfit exponentially and require the same amount of effort as a T-shirt. This one in particular has a much more interesting design than standard stripes, and its back is button-up, which is a simple way to make this tunic look more out of the ordinary. Since tunics take up the majority of the body’s area, I wanted to remain with one of my ‘safe’ colours so that I knew I would wear this as often as I’d like to.

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Unconventionally ruffled ‘fancy’ spaghetti strapped top (ASOS)

My spaghetti-strapped tops are always my saving grace when it comes to thinking of an outfit to go out in. I’ve never been comfortable showing off my chest too much, or wearing anything that showed more skin than cloth. This top can turn from a day-top to a night-out top, which is also a plus. It has a ruffle design to create motion, and the buttons complete the design with a fancier top-up accent.

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Mesh top with pearls in a soft colour (ASOS)

I’ve wanted to find an entirely mesh top for ages, but anything I find always ends up being a crop top. I never like to emphasise my chest because I feel that it makes my whole frame seem larger. Longer tops elongate my torso and make me feel more comfortable in my skin. This one was a home-run. I love the pearls, which create noise. It’s always good to wear something noisy. I love the colour, something that you can wear with anything and to any kind of event. It can be dressed up or down and played with. I’m impressed I didn’t pass on this one in exchange for a black one.

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Knit top in a return-to-the-90’s colour (Zara)

This is the softest thing I’ve ever touched. It also has the best colour to wear during winter…  Something cool but oddly rich and warm. I like to wear things that reflect my mood and can make me feel comfortable with my presentation. During the winter months, this is also the simplest item to wear that will make you look and feel more put-together than a shirt and cardigan or a long-sleeved top that hardly keeps you warm enough.

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